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5.04.2010

A deep yearning.


I want to get out of the concrete of the city and allow my feet to dig deep roots in a life of simplicity.

I dream of nights that wrap me up in blankets of star sparkle, instead of the warm glow of high-rises and traffic lights.

I dream of big blue skies and countless days in the brightness of warm rays.

I want the little toes of my boy to feel familiar in cool grass and dirt rather than pavement.

I want a garden. I want to learn how to grow things... nurture them... then find our bellies full of the goodness we've grown.

I dream of small town markets and a one-stop-shop for coffee... a place where I see my neighbors in the morning.

My heart aches for that big front porch with a swing that whispers "Grace is in this house."

I desire warm summer nights in that porch swing with my love. His arm around me, sitting with me in the quiet sparkle while the boy dreams his adventure boy dreams in the quiet room upstairs.

I dream of big color blooms of lilacs and honeysuckle and tulips and roses in the spring, making beautiful bouquets on our kitchen counter.

I yearn for the slow. The pause. The simple. The quiet.

So what do you do? What do you do when your deepest yearnings collide with life? If you sit in my chair, you never stop dreaming those big dreams of stars and porches.

But, you pray.

Pray for calm. Pray for the deepest peace that only comes from the One. Though I sit in the hardened grey of the city, He does a soft but strong growing in me through the waiting and yearning.

I may be living in a concrete life, I may yearn for days in the dirt, but I choose to believe that beautiful things can grow in the cracks of pavement.

What are the desires of your heart?

10 comments:

  1. I am new to your blog, but am enjoying your posts. Thank you for making me stop and think a little deeper, sometimes I get lost in the rush of life and don't dig deep enough. Running after my short-nap son, I barely have time to comment on blogs but yours seems to always be worth the read. :)

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  2. i agree with celeste. I love waking up to read your blog. The true desires of my heart are to follow the Lord and please Him in all that i do. All of those earthly things would be nice to. (I write about that in my blog today) but ultimately i yearn for the day when He says "Great job my good and faithful servant, welcome to Heaven" :)

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  3. The desires of my heart is to be a Mom. With PCOS I have been struggling for a year now to be pregnant. I know the Lord has a plan and I pray each day that he will help me be patient and focus on glorifying him.

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  4. I desire to SLOW DOWN! To take in the beauty of life and let teh laundry pile and roll in the grass with my baby instead. I wish I could give up the idea of a perfect & clean home and instead embrace the idea of a perfect & clean heart that serves the Lord.

    I love your blog, and as always thanks for sharing!

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  5. right now I desire to be settled in. I feel unraveled and I want to be put back together. Settling in to the new place is taking a very long time as things that need fixed beg for attention louder than boxes that need unpacked. I know it'll happen soon, but man oh man is it wearing on me.

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  6. My prayer is for peace too. Everything springs from that prayer right now.

    But I have always wanted a big porch ~ maybe someday :)

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  7. Kindred spirit here. I'm with you.

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  8. "but I choose to believe that beautiful things can grow in the cracks of pavement." - Yes, me too! It just takes more determined eyes to see them sometimes, I think.

    And it made me think of a song I grew up with and love to blast on long rides through the concrete jungle http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1GG--v6vHo

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  9. I feel the peace that you speak everyday at our ranch. But even when things are perfect there is always just one little thing you want. In my case I made the porch a sitting room off of my old farmhouse bedroom. Now, I just need a new LARGE porch. I am hoping for that to happen sooner than later, but we will see!

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  10. I dream of having a healthy relationship, instead of just writing about what that might look like...

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